ANP

Did I really left him? I'm still wondering

Afterwards as I sat up in bed and sipped my morning tea, I found myself trying to account for the flavour of reality that confused me in his impossible reminiscences, by supposing they did in some way suggest, present, convey - I hardly know which word to use - experiences it was otherwise impossible to tell.
Well, I don't resort to that explanation now. I have got over my intervening doubts. I believe now, as I believed at the moment of leaving , that he did to the very best of his ability . But whether he himself saw, or only thought he saw, whether he himself was the possessor of an inestimable privilege or the victim of a fantastic dream, I cannot pretend to guess. Even the facts of his looks, which ended my doubts for ever, throw no light on that.
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strange!!!! I feel safe and sound! have I ever been better than now?